no, I have to face the truth: It is over.
... yeah, I think I am giving up hope now - she has sent me an e-mail, asking to meet me for a coffee... and gave me lots of different dates... this in itself was kind of cery nice BUT for the fact that these dates indicate that she's seeing her boyfriend this weekend...
I guess she won't have to cancel that - and won't see any need to.... which means to me that she's obviously made a decision... not sure whether it's concious or sub-concious, but does that really matter?
Oh well, seems as if it is in fact time to say "good-bye" to what I think might have been the love of my life.....
I did not regret getting into this... it's been a very painful few weeks, but I've learned a lot... though I am disappointed - disappointed because I had hoped that she would at least give us a chance to find out what our feelings are about. Though given her past experience, I accept that it was not possible for her... yet it does not prevent me from being very sad...
So, I've now got a hard time ahead of me as I need to work on pushing my emotions away as quickly as possible. Won't be easy, but it's all I have left.... :-(
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