Today....

I am more or less ok... yes, I am still very sad - and I don't think that it will change anytime soon... but I noticed that I am not jealous anymore... and that's good, as it means that I have really started to accept her decision... so it's only a questions of time until this feeling of "hope" vanishes - and I think that once I don't have any hope anymore, I'll be better able to deal with my emotions.... :

Well, I may meet her today for a cig break... she said yesterday that she wouldn't mind one.... let's see whether she'll ask...