Still needs time...

well, what can I say? I am still missing my affair terribly, I am sad, and I simply cannot accept that it is over.

And I've come to the conclusion that this will not change - and therefore made a decision: I really need to find a new job, preferably in another town - because as long as I am physically close to her, I'll never be able to forget.... so, the job hunting is starting again!

The weekend was not that great: After I felt that my wife and I were making progress and I was getting hopeful, the weekend was not great at all, and I am less sure than I was before that we can make it last... but let's see: I think we both feel that we've made two steps backward and that we urgently need to change it again for the better!

But I've got good news as well: I've met this girl again on Thursday, and I was absolutely not interested, depsite the fact that she asked me directly whether I wanted to have some "fun" again! It was a very liberating experience - not only to say "no", but also to feel "no". If anybody had told me a few moth ago that I would be able to say "no" in such a situation, I would not have believe it... So, this issue is at last behind me; unfortunately one experience too late, but I cannot do anything about that.